6 Ways To Make People Like You

#4 - Be a good listener, encourage others to talk about themselves.

Some time ago, Dale Carnegie attended a bridge party. While there he met a woman that knew a man Dale had actually traveled around with in Europe. She wanted Dale to tell her all about his travels throughout Europe. As they sat down on the sofa, right before Dale was going to start into his travels, she mentioned she and her husband had recently returned home from Africa. Immediately Dale showed interest in her trip and told her he had never been but always wanted to visit. For the next forty-five minutes she talked about that Africa trip. She never again asked him about his travels in Europe. All she wanted was an interested listener, so she could expand her ego and tell about where she had been.

Naturally, we are all like this woman. We like to share with people things we have accomplished, seen, and participated in. We need LISTENERS! However, if we are the ones doing all the talking, who is going to do the listening?

If you want to know how to make people shun you and laugh at you behind your back and even despise you, here is the recipe: Never listen to anyone for long. Talk incessantly about yourself. If you have an idea while the other person is talking, don’t wait for him or her to finish: bust right in and interrupt in the middle of a sentence. I’m sure we know a few people like this. They are bores, intoxicated with their own egos, drunk with a sense of their own importance.

Now if you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. TO BE INTERESTING, BE INTERESTED. Ask questions that other persons will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments.

Remember – people that you talk to are 100 times more interested in themselves and their wants and problems than they are in you and your problems. In other words – make it a habit to be a good listener.

This is principle 4.